The Parable of the Two Sisters

Dear Old Friend,

I’m writing this to you Thanksgiving night.  I hope you had a wonderful time with your family.  I know that most of the responsibility falls on your shoulders this holiday, but I hope you were still able to enjoy the day!

I’ve just returned home from spending a lovely afternoon and evening with my son and his family.  I only had a few dishes that I was asked to prepare, and, although I offered my services today, I was set free to have a delightful time with my little four year old grandson while others slaved away in the kitchen.

The parable of Mary and Martha in Luke 10:38-42 crossed my mind a couple of times.  Yes, I said "parable", even though it is a story about real people in a real situation.  A man by the name of Fred Smith used to say that all of life illustrates Bible doctrine, and I happen to agree.  Oftentimes real stories about real people have a deeper meaning than what seems apparent on the surface. 

I am absolutely certain that you would be able to tell me how “The” sermon about the story of Mary and Martha typically goes.  Everyone who has attended church for any length of time has heard it.  It begins by telling us that Martha was too busy worrying about all of the "unimportant" things to be done, while Mary sat at Jesus feet; and, when Martha tried to get Jesus to make Mary help her, Jesus put her in her place and told her that Mary had chosen the right thing, while she had not.  

We are asked to ponder whether we are a Martha or a Mary, with the implication that being a Martha is bad and being a Mary is good. This leaves those who like to serve feeling guilty, while those who prefer to sit around and read feel virtuous.

Then we in the congregation are admonished to be intentional about putting Jesus first in our lives, primarily by having quiet time, preferably in the morning.  And we are encouraged to learn to say “No”, even to seemingly good things, so that our lives will be less busy, and we will have more time to sit at Jesus’ feet.  Right?  You could recite it with me, couldn’t you?

We have a problem, however, if this story was simply intended to be about practical tips for Christian Living.  Hospitality is listed as one of the spiritual gifts and, in real life, Martha was simply trying to be a good hostess, which was the hospitable thing to do.  It would have been rude for her not to do anything for her guest.  

Also, in real life, the right thing for Mary to do would certainly have been to help her sister with “all the preparations that had to be made”.  If both of them had worked together the tasks would have taken half the time and then both of them could have sat down and listened to Jesus. 

It was reasonable for Martha to be upset, because she knew this to be true and she expected Jesus to back her up; and, if this was just a real life story, Jesus would have backed her up.  He would  probably have talked to Mary about how we need to share the load, be sensitive to each other’s feelings and needs, and not just think of ourselves.  He might have pointed out to her that Martha could also have benefitted from sitting at his feet, but that Mary’s selfishness had robbed her of that opportunity.  And, he would have been right. 

So, why didn’t he?  And, what is it that we have missed by telling the story, ad nauseam,  in such a way that we shame all of the real life Marthas for trying to be good hostesses while making the selfish, insensitive Marys the heroines for not helping out?  I believe we have missed the point that this is a parable about works and grace, rather than a practical guide for Christian behavior.

Parable Martha represents all those who live as though they need to do things for God in order to earn his favor; those who believe that they have to have it all together and must work tirelessly in order to prove to themselves, to God and to others that they are genuine Christians.  They worry that if they rest for a moment, they will appear to be displaying a lack of commitment to the Kingdom. They are bothered because they look at themselves and see how far short they fall from what they know they should be and should do.

In that context, Jesus’ response to Martha makes sense, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things, but only one thing is necessary.  Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.”

Parable Mary represents those who understand that the “good part” is Jesus.  Not just making him their first priority, but realizing that he is everything; knowing there is nothing they need to or can do for God to earn his favor.  

Jesus has already satisfied every requirement.  We have nothing to prove to ourselves, to God or to others.  God is not looking for a display of our commitment to his Kingdom to be found in our endless good behavior; he is looking for the gratitude and amazement on our faces as we sit in humble awe at Jesus’ feet and finally grasp that when he said “It is finished”, he meant it.  Jesus alone is the “one thing” which is necessary and can never be taken away.

So, I say we need to hear more sermons telling all of the Real Life Marthas it's okay to serve with all of their hearts, souls and might, without shame!  And all of the Real Life Marys should be told to get up off their bottoms and help their sisters!

But, more than that, I think we need to hear more sermons telling the Parable Marthas that they can stop their striving to earn God’s love and approval and allow themselves to become like the Parable Marys who joyfully rest at Jesus’ feet, knowing that, because of what he did, the love and approval they have always longed for is already theirs.

I need to hear that every day! 

Love Always,

Bonnie